Guest blogger: Houlder

As dictated by Houlder -- unedited.

I feel badly.

I am listening to Black Boy by Richard Wright which is really hard.  I have had to listen to it a couple of times, and I don't get it.  Mom said if I continue to have a hard time with it to move onto Lord of the Flies and just try that.  It is like when I was watching James Bond in the hospital and I would watch what was happening.  I would see all the fighting and stuff and think it was cool, but  I couldn't follow the story line.  It was just some cool action but it was mostly meaningless to me.

It is frustrating, and I just want to get better to go back to normal and be able to do all the stuff I used to be able to do like swim and school and friends.

I have been working on a model boat I started last summer.  It is helpful.  It is simple.  I am just gluing the pieces together and sanding and stuff.  It is pretty simple, and it feels good to be able to be doing something instead of just lying around and doing nothing.  I have gotten to the hard part of rigging the masts and stuff.  I have gotten to the hard part, and I am thinking I might have to do some with Mom or Dad helping me.

In the hospital, I expected it to be like me sitting around sort of uncomfortable in the hospital bed looking at the clock waiting for the day to go by which is what I sure Mom was doing.  But because I was on the really strong pain meds, it was all actually kind of easy.  It went by pretty fast.  Watching tv and movies and listening to a book mom was reading me that was all kind of like a distraction and I guess, I guess that made it easier even though I was not really watching it.  The nights were like, the nights were kind of weird because the nurses would wake me up every couple of hours to give more medicine.  It was just weird.  I am usually not awake that much, but I wasn't tired at all.  I thought that was kind of weird.

I have really liked it when people have come to visit.  It is fun to see people because I have not seen anyone in a long time.   Thanks to everyone at Poseidon for the balloons and the card.  Thanks to everyone bringing us meals -- they are all really good.  It was really cool to see my Riverside Outfitters friends when they came to see me at the hospital. 

During acupuncture I am usually lying face up, and he gives me the needles.  I fall asleep but it's more like when I wake up it feels like the most restful sleep I've ever had.  It puts me in a state afterward that I feel kind of rested and calm and helps get through all of this.  It doesn't really take away the pain but definitely the pain doesn't bother me while I am asleep on the table.  The pain comes back when I wake up.  Dad left me waiting for over an hour at the acupuncturist while he was at St. Mary's talking to a doctor but that was okay because they are all really nice there. 

I don't mind all the tests because I feel that they are getting me one step closer to getting me better.  Some of the doctors are pretty nice.  So far most of them don't seem to be that interested, or I don't know.  Dr. Tipton has been really nice and is worried about me which I think is cool, and I really appreciate that.  He is helping us a lot finding someone who can find out what is wrong.  But I am kind of tired of the appointments and the hospitals.  I would be fine going to more but only if they knew what they were doing.  Some of the appointments seem useless because they don't seem to know what is going on, and some of the doctors even seem unhelpful. 

I am learning that a lot of doctors are worried about covering their asses so that they don't get in trouble.  So sometimes to do that they don't help someone like me.  It is really annoying.

We need a "Dr. House" without the attitude or drug problems.  Hahaha.

Thanks for reading my ramblings.

Houlder