Resolution. Intention. Aspiration.

Flee from the concept or embrace it?

 

In looking ahead, how can we escape looking behind?

How can I adequately review our year?  

It feels dishonest to spin everything glossy and sunny to remember a rosy view for what was a begrudgingly difficult year.  It feels either Sylvia Pathian to play my misery is greater than yours or Pollyanna-ish to delight in all we've met.

We lived.  We ate heartily.  We laughed.  We cried.  We trolled the internet.  We drove.  We read.  We sat.  We waited.  We grumbled.  We visited doctors.  We danced.  We stayed at hospitals.  We went to Ocracoke.  We swam.  We cheered.  We yelled.  We raked.  We laundered.  We baked. We played soccer.  We played little league. We survived.

Stunningly, we were held by friends -- new ones and life-long.  

If you ask Porter, he will tell you two things:  1) "I don't want to eat anyone else's food," and 2) "My cats."

If you ask Houlder, he will say: 1) "I can drive for you," and 2) "POTS."

If you ask Frazer, he will be silent or offer to lego/bey blade with you.

If you ask Dell, he will think.  And, maybe he can tell you after you ask him 3-4 more times.  

If you ask Will, he will shake his head and grimace and say 1) "Can it suck anymore?" and 2) "Will our kids ever do anything to help?"

My memories vary: the strength we found in each other, the exhaustion of it all, the kindness of friends, the path of our lives determined by our health, the tender time we need to give each other, the kindness Collegiate has shared, the intensely amazing community of Southampton, the tolerance of St. Thomas for atheist acolytes and unwavering  offerings of prayers, the tolerance and patience needed to raise four boys, the generosity of homeschooling buddies always willing to let Frazer tag along, the willingness of my dad and Will's parents to help, the unexpected gift of Kenyon K80ans, the cuteness of kittens, the delight of believing in Santa and the tooth fairy, the sunsets and cocktails at Ocracoke, the willingness of neighbors to drive my kids to and from school, the support of friends, and the fortitude of my husband.

Our resolution is simple:  keep on.  Our intention is wellness.   Our aspiration is home improvement.

It has been rewarding to have an place to process our lives and an honor to have been read.